I’ve never really understood privacy……..
Hands up those friends out there who know WAY too much about me? Those who I have told all manner of things, from descriptive details of how Lucy’s birth went down to what colour my poo was yesterday. Those who I have made inspect my boobs (and I’m not talking about the doctor this time!) for lumps or rashes, or those who have heard all about my most personal moments in life. What’s that?! All of you put your hands up!?
I have always been an open book. It’s my thing. 98% of the time, you will know exactly what I am thinking. I appear to be missing a filter of sorts that allows me to sort my thoughts into two sections…..private and public. Like before I have even had a chance to consider if I should say, I have already told you all about my entire day, how I have felt for most of it, and what funny/embarrassing thing that happened to me during that time. It just happens before I even realise!
Take today for an example. I went to work looking a little under the weather. Perhaps that doesn’t quite capture it…..I was told by a friend that I maybe shouldn’t have come to work looking like I did today. A colleague called me ‘the Elephant Man’. Same colleague also referred to me as Beavis (from Beavis and Butthead), and my sister suggested I looked a little ‘special’. And you know when people laugh that little bit too quickly, and way too loudly, because it is sooooo true? Well, my work buddies had a belly laugh when I asked them if I looked like Quasi Modo! Greg said I didn’t even look like myself. Lucy still loved me.
So what happened to me, you say? Well, after lunch yesterday (and no, I didn’t eat anything I am allergic to) I felt my eye was a little itchy. So I scratched it. And it grew and grew and grew. To the point when I may or may not have looked like a victim of assault, people were alarmed! My eye was so swollen and puffy, I looked completely differently. This morning that eye had settled down…..but the other eye was now puffy.
Now, I don’t want you to think, oh a puffy eye, no big deal. It was so severe that people were doing double takes when they saw me. ‘Oh, I thought you were Lauren…oh wait – it is you! Holy shit, what happened to your face!?’ This actually happened. Today. Several times! I was even worried about going swimming this morning because I was concerned the goggles may become suctioned onto my face permanently – thankfully they didn’t. Apparently I may be allergic to Aspro Clear!
I’m way sexy today.
Yet some people would be mortified to declare this to the world. I’m not sure why though, because it can’t be helped. Actually, I can be helped, take Panadol instead! But you get my point. And this is what I mean regarding my tell-all approach in life. I just reveal, and reveal and reveal all the time. Because, somewhere, someone will be amused to think of how horrendous I looked today! Bastards.
Why not share it all? I don’t really understand why people are so private sometimes. In fact, what would this blog be if not a true pouring out of my emotions, thoughts and experiences? There wouldn’t be a blog at all.
Over the past 11 months that I have enjoyed writing to you, I have been ever so conscious about what I am writing, who might read it, and what could happen as a result of my declarations to the world. Before I press that publish button, I sit here for a good minute (when, clearly I should be editing the blog for spelling and grammatical errors!) and consider the consequences of releasing the blog. For example, last week I wrote about people close to me who may be unsupportive of my weight loss journey. They read my blog regularly, so it was important for me to write it in a way that would help them understand my point of view, my perspective. And of course, the last thing I’d want to do is hurt anyone by airing dirty laundry for the sake of it.
But even after I weigh up who might read the blog (should my boss really know about the doctor I am constantly flashing my boobs to!?), it always comes down to who I am as a person. And that person is an unfiltered, unadulterated, and often limitless but honest person who just wants her heart heard. What you see is what you get with me.
That is my flaw. My strength!
And people usually have one of two responses to my blog. They either cringe when they read it, because they can’t believe I have put that online for everyone to read, or they smile and love it, because they feel refreshed by my honesty. And they RELATE to my stories.
Last week, as I poured my raging heart out over the injustice I felt regarding feeling unsupported, I connected with more than just a few people. I had many people contact me to let me know they had my back and to encourage me in my journey of self-discovery and health. And I also had people who felt I spoke for them. People felt that I had written from their heart, that I had vocalised their thoughts, feelings and experiences better than they could have. It was AMAZING how many people felt this way! Like I had given them a voice - talk about being humbled!
But it made me reflect on the very purpose of this blog. Originally it was to document my journey in finding a hobby. Then it became the hobby itself. But only now do I realise it is my method of connecting with the world. Because every single time I put my own heart on the line, and become vulnerable before you all, out of the woodwork come people who are empowered to finally speak of the same situation in their own life. And not only am I sharing my ‘private’ things with you, but I have people share back their situations in return.
This blog isn’t all just me giving you an entertaining read. It’s me giving you the opportunity to share too.
Sorry no pic today, I'm blogging from my phone due to technical issues...
Ciao for now,
LG - Life's Great!
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To add insult to injury (or allergy), Lucy’s pointer finger and my eyeball had an accidental collision last night as we were playing around, and as a result my puffy swollen eye is also MEGA red.
I’m way sexy today.
Yet some people would be mortified to declare this to the world. I’m not sure why though, because it can’t be helped. Actually, I can be helped, take Panadol instead! But you get my point. And this is what I mean regarding my tell-all approach in life. I just reveal, and reveal and reveal all the time. Because, somewhere, someone will be amused to think of how horrendous I looked today! Bastards.
Why not share it all? I don’t really understand why people are so private sometimes. In fact, what would this blog be if not a true pouring out of my emotions, thoughts and experiences? There wouldn’t be a blog at all.
Over the past 11 months that I have enjoyed writing to you, I have been ever so conscious about what I am writing, who might read it, and what could happen as a result of my declarations to the world. Before I press that publish button, I sit here for a good minute (when, clearly I should be editing the blog for spelling and grammatical errors!) and consider the consequences of releasing the blog. For example, last week I wrote about people close to me who may be unsupportive of my weight loss journey. They read my blog regularly, so it was important for me to write it in a way that would help them understand my point of view, my perspective. And of course, the last thing I’d want to do is hurt anyone by airing dirty laundry for the sake of it.
But even after I weigh up who might read the blog (should my boss really know about the doctor I am constantly flashing my boobs to!?), it always comes down to who I am as a person. And that person is an unfiltered, unadulterated, and often limitless but honest person who just wants her heart heard. What you see is what you get with me.
That is my flaw. My strength!
And people usually have one of two responses to my blog. They either cringe when they read it, because they can’t believe I have put that online for everyone to read, or they smile and love it, because they feel refreshed by my honesty. And they RELATE to my stories.
Last week, as I poured my raging heart out over the injustice I felt regarding feeling unsupported, I connected with more than just a few people. I had many people contact me to let me know they had my back and to encourage me in my journey of self-discovery and health. And I also had people who felt I spoke for them. People felt that I had written from their heart, that I had vocalised their thoughts, feelings and experiences better than they could have. It was AMAZING how many people felt this way! Like I had given them a voice - talk about being humbled!
But it made me reflect on the very purpose of this blog. Originally it was to document my journey in finding a hobby. Then it became the hobby itself. But only now do I realise it is my method of connecting with the world. Because every single time I put my own heart on the line, and become vulnerable before you all, out of the woodwork come people who are empowered to finally speak of the same situation in their own life. And not only am I sharing my ‘private’ things with you, but I have people share back their situations in return.
