Everybody Loves a Whinger

Easy Luck or a Charmed Perspective

We all know that person who is genuinely hard done by. Life is tough and they seem to continually be knocked down with one shit thing after the next. They have had a long and difficult path, and all the good stuff seems to fly straight past them and land at the feet of that person who won Lotto last year, has already paid off their mortgage at the ripe old age of 25 (thank you Grandpa's inheritance)- the very same person that has their health, a hot partner, a successful and interesting career and adorable family of good-looking wonder-kids.

But what about that person who thinks they have it tough...and clearly don't. Bloody EMO kids on facebook all over the shop wishing people would see them for who they really are, telling us how tough it is to be a teenager. Those same kids will end up running this country, as they will grow up being told they can be/do anything in the world. Perhaps knowing that you too could be a Scientist, a Professor or the Prime Minister, or a Truck Driver, Checkout Chick or Sanitary Bin Collector is simply too much pressure?! Whatever kids, life isn't as bad as you wish it was. 

Let's be honest. Isn't it great to have something to complain about? Hell, I am here everyday complaining about my lack of hobby/my weight/my issues in life, so I am just as much to blame as everyone else. People love hearing that someone else is doing it harder than us - it's in our nature to some up our lives against others and realise in comparison that actually we are doing okay! At least we aren't afflicted by 'insert issue/illness/drama here'. It's the old 'uglier friend' trick, making you look better than you actually are. ;) I'm onto you!

But how about when it works the opposite way? How about when you hear that people are doing well? Does anyone really want to hear that? BORING! Because upon reflection it can make some of us focus on our own insecurities and we don't measure up quite as good as we did when you complained about that shit thing in your life. "Hmmmm....you say you got a pay rise? Awesome! Perhaps that will help you get rid of that shit box you are driving around eh, maybe get a nice car like mine?!" ;) Can't we just be happy for each other?! 

I feel that my life has been judged occasionally for being so lucky. So lucky to be in my job that pays well and have the security of my role. So lucky to have my close family. So lucky to have my husband and my daughter. My house, my friends, my boat, my talents, the list goes on and on. Yes, I absolutely agree with you. And I think you'll vouch for me if you know me personally: I live in constant state of awe and gratefulness at my luck too. But a good deal of it has come from my time and efforts invested, through my hard work, growing networks, and making smart decisions. And yes, some has just come as a pure blessing, for which I thank God everyday. Some people reading this have even commented along the lines of 'but why would you want to change anything about your life!? Isn't it already perfect...?'

Do you realise it is more socially acceptable to share hardships and tough times. People want to hear about your sleepless nights and the fights you have had with your husband, not about your first child that slept through the night at 11 weeks old and how you love your man more and more every time you see him holding the child he has gifted to you. Negativity is simply sharing....... but I have found positivity is considered to be bragging. 

Next time you ponder the amazingness of someone else's life with a hint of spite, consider the things you aren't privy to. Perhaps like me, they prefer to have a charmed perspective. Realising that actually, most of us don't deserve any of what we are given, so be grateful for it, because in life there are so many people worse off than you. 

But don't be naive enough to think that because they choose to see the positive that that's all their life entails. Don't make the poorly educated assumption that their life is absent of deep and lasting grief, loss of very dear and loved ones, desperation for answers, anger at issues unresolved, resentment of misunderstandings, and a yearning to find themselves. 

 

Now listen here you lot - don't judge a book by it's cover and be happy for your friends!

Embrace other peoples creativity, happiness and joy without judgement. Just be happy that even if you can't have the luck at the moment, at least somebody you know can.

Ciao for now,

LG, Life's Good